Aashna翻译
一个即将回到西方的桑雅士说：我真的很害怕回去。我想问你，当我回去了，你是否可以帮助我。
A sannyasin who is returning to the West says: I’m really scared about going back. I wanted to ask you if you’d help me when I’m back there.
奥修OSHO：
当你回到一个你一直属于其中，但现在你再也不属于其中的世界时，很多人会感到恐惧、害怕。所以现在你是去到一个新的国度，作为一个陌生人，去到那些认为他们了解你的人那里。现在你知道他们并不了解你，但他们会理所当然的认为他们了解你。他们会继续跟你的过去联系，而不是你。他们会期待你的行为表现像他们以为的那样，而你没办法那样子。这整个的情形会制造恐惧。
The fear comes to many people because you go back into a world to which you have always belonged and now you don’t belong to it any more. So you are going to a foreign country, as a stranger, to people who think that they know you. Now you know that they don’t, but they will take it for granted that they know you. They will go on making contacts with your past, not with you. They will expect you to behave the way they think you should have behave, and you cannot behave that way. This whole situation creates a fear.
我们总是在胃里或喉咙里感觉到恐惧、害怕。如果是在胃里，它有一种特定的品质。如果是在喉咙里，它有一个完全不同的品质。在喉咙里感觉到的恐惧是对沟通、交流的恐惧。在胃里感觉到的恐惧是对死亡的恐惧。
Fear is always felt at the stomach or at the throat. If it is felt at the stomach it has a certain quality. If it is felt at the throat, it has a totally different quality. The fear that is felt at the throat is the fear of communication. It will be difficult for you now to communicate with people. When the fear is felt at the stomach it is fear of death.
如果你深入静心，死亡的恐惧会升起，你会在肚脐中心感觉到，在腹部，在死亡中心。如果你准备要交流沟通，你会在喉咙感觉到恐惧，因为喉咙是表达、沟通、连结的中心。当恐惧在爱的关系里升起时，恐惧是在喉咙，因为小孩子第一次接收到爱是从妈妈那里，通过喉咙中心。这是他跟世界的第一次接触。妈妈的乳房是他的第一次接触，第一份关系，而这是透过喉咙中心。这就是为何弗洛伊德学派把小孩子叫做“oral”（口的，用嘴的）。这是他们头脑的口腔状态（oral state）。无论何时，只要你得到或给出一些东西，它都是通过喉咙中心。
If you go deep in meditation, the fear of death arises and that is felt just below the navel centre, at the hara, the death centre. If you are going to communicate, the fear will be felt at the throat because the throat is the centre of expression, communication, relating. When fear arises in relationship to love, it is at the throat, because the child receives love for the first time from the mother through the throat centre. That is his first contact with the world. Mother’s breast is his first contact, first relationship, and that is through the throat centre. That’s why Freudians call small children ’oral’. That is the oral state of their mind. Whenever you are getting something or giving something, it passes through the throat centre.
所以我可以了解……恐惧是自然的。不要试图逃避它，也不要试图压抑它。不要试图忘记它，否则解决它就会变得困难。接纳它——这是自然的。这完全是自然的，回到老朋友身边，而你已经完全不是过去那个你了。你的朋友们会非常困惑该怎么和你相处，因为我们习惯于一种特定的模式。
So I can understand… the fear is natural. Don’t try to avoid it and don’t try to suppress it. Don’t try to forget it, otherwise it will be difficult to get over it. Accept it – it is natural. It is absolutely natural going back to old friends and not being the old person at all. Your friends will be very much in confusion about how to relate to you, because we get accustomed to a certain pattern.
无论何时，当一个人开始静心，他的关系世界必须改变。一个人改变了，那么他所有的关系——跟妻子的，跟孩子的，跟朋友的，甚至跟敌人的——需要改变。他来到一个破灭之际。他再次进入这个世界，以一个新的身份。
Whenever a person starts meditating, his world of relationships has to be changed. One person changes, then all his relationships – with the wife, children, friends, even enemies – have to change. He comes to a shattering. He enters into the world again with a new identity.
当你在这里，作为一个门徒，这是一回事。你可以跟人们连结。你住在一个社区里，在这里，很多灵魂都走在同一条路上，朝着同一个方向前行，活在同一种心境里。但是当你回去，恐惧会出现。某种程度上来说，这是好的。
When you are here as a sannyasin it is one thing. You can relate with people. You live in a commune of souls who are following the same path, moving in the same direction, living in the same vibe. But when you go back, the fear will come. It is good in a way.
一旦你回去了，恐惧会出现，但是不会持续超过一周。所以不要逃避。在那一周里，去见所有的朋友，还有过去你相处的人，不要假装做过去的你。一周之内它就会消失，因为你将有能力跟别人相处、连结的更好。
Once you are back, the fear will be there for not more than a week. So don’t hide. In that one week meet all the friends and persons to whom you have related in the past, and don’t try to pretend to be the old self. Within a week it will disappear because you will be able to relate better than ever.
你可以变成一个懦夫，试图去逃避。比如，你可以回去，改变你的衣着，当你见朋友时你不穿红袍（在普那奥修社区，所有的门徒白天必须穿红袍，带静心、课程或提供个案期间除外，这一方式延续至今），或者你把你的马拉（mala，早先奥修门徒佩戴的佛珠项链）。然后你试图假装你是过去那个你，别人没有必要用一种新的方式跟你相处。不要这样做。
You can become a coward and try to hide. For example, you can go there and change your dress, and when you go to see a person you don’t wear orange or you hide your mala. Then you will try to pretend you are the old person and that there is no need for anyone to relate to you in a new way. Don’t do that.
永远也不要让恐惧决定你的生活方式——永远也别。无论困难有多大，绝不要让它决定你的生活方式。只有爱可以被允许，来决定你的生活方式，除此无他。其他任何东西都是不相干的。
Never allow fear to dictate your life-style – never. Howsoever difficult it may be, never allow it to dictate your life-style. Only love should be allowed to dictate your life-style, nothing else. Everything else is irrelevant.
回去。在七天里你会陷入麻烦；但是举止像门徒一样，给人们打电话，和他们联系，告诉他们那个过去的你已经死了，现在你重生了，成了一个全新的人。告诉他们，现在跟你相处或许有一点麻烦，因为你是全新的。
Just go. For seven days you will be in a trouble; but move as a sannyasin, phone people, contact them, and tell them that the old person is dead and you are completely new, reborn. Tell them that now it may be a problem to relate to you because you are absolutely new.
如果这七天你能够坚持，人们就会开始跟你相处。事实上他们会开心：一个新朋友，一段新关系开始了。一些新鲜也进入他们的生活里，通过你。一扇新的窗户打开了，一股新鲜的微风吹进了他们的房间。
If you can stick to that for only seven days, people start relating to you. In fact they will be happy: a new friend, a new relationship arises. Something fresh enters into their life also, through you. A new window opens, a new breeze enters into the room.
我将会跟你在一起……不要担心。任何时候，当你感觉有任何的恐惧从你喉咙里升起，把项链坠（佛珠上那个奥修的头像）握在手里，想着我。
I am going to be with you… don’t be worried. Whenever you feel any fear arising in the throat, take the locket in your hand and remember me.
在那里，作为我的一个管道来工作。对于你的工作来说这会变得非常非常容易，你的工作会变得非常灵巧和娴熟。它会有一个伟大的深度在其中。允许它。就只是放空——就好像你不知道你是谁，你不知道你要做什么，你要怎样回应，你将怎样回应一件情形。就只是等待那个情形出现，让我通过你来回应。如果你允许我，三周之内你就会感觉到一种绝对的连结。然后你成了一个链环。如果你失败了，是我失败了。如果你成功了，是我成功了。跟你没有任何关系。你可以笑这件事情。无论你成功还是失败，这跟你一点关系也没有；那么你整个的运作就会不一样。
Start working there as a vehicle for me. It will be very very much easier for you to work and your work will become very skillful. It will have a great depth to it. Allow me. Just be empty – as if you don’t know who you are and you don’t know what you are going to do, how you are going to reply; how you are going to respond in a situation. Simply wait for the situation to arise and let me respond through you. If you allow me, within three weeks you will be able to feel an absolute contact. Then you become a link. If you fail, I fail. If you succeed, I succeed. It is nothing to do with you. You can laugh about it. Whether you succeed or fail, it has nothing to do with you; then your whole functioning will be different.
今天我刚巧在读一个禅师，登山（Tozan）——一个非常有名的师父。故事说，神们想要见他，但是他们见不到，因为他就只是空无。他们可以从这边从那边进入他里面，他们可以穿透他，但是哪儿也找不到他。他是无处（nowhere-ness,），无物（nothingness），他是如此的空无，以至于他们无法看见他。他们很好奇见到一个已经变成空无的人，所以他们耍了一个把戏。
Just today I was reading about a zen master, Tozan – a very famous zen master. The story says that the gods wanted to see him, but they couldn’t because he was just an emptiness. They would enter into him from this side and that, they would pass through him, but he was nowhere to be found. He was a nowhere-ness, a nothingness… so empty of himself that they could not see him. They were very curious to see a man who had become empty, so they played a trick.
当登山早上散完步返回时，他们走进厨房，抓了几把米，把它撒在了他要经过的路上。在禅院里，不敬重米粮简直就是犯戒。所有的东西都应当被敬重，因为每一样东西都是神圣的。它跟经济没有任何关系，跟甘地思想也没有任何关系——因为这类思想就只是把吝啬合理化而已。它跟这个没有任何关系。它是对万物的敬重。所有存在着的和存在过的，都是神圣的，都应当被敬重。
They went to the kitchen as Tozan was coming from his morning walk and took a few handfuls of rice and wheat and threw it on his path. In a zen monastery that is almost a sin because it is very disrespectful to rice and wheat. Everything should be respected because everything is divine. It has nothing to do with ordinary economics, nothing to do with a gandhian ideology – because that type of ideology is nothing but rationalised miserliness. This had nothing to do with that. It is a respect for everything. Everything that exists and has existed, is divine and should be respected.
所以在一间禅院里，没有什么会被浪费；一个人应当细心、警觉。他们耍了个把戏，在他要经过的路上撒了几把大米。当登山经过时他无法相信——竟然有弟子把米给撒了。是谁干的？是谁这么粗心和不敬重？
So in a zen monastery nothing is wasted; one should be careful, and alert. They played this trick and threw on his path a few handfuls of rice and wheat. When Tozan came he could not believe it – that any disciple could do that. Who could do it? Who could be so careless and disrespectful?
这个念头在他内在升起，突然地自我出现了，神们可以看到他了。那份空无已经不在了。突然地一个念头显现出来；一个态度，一个思绪出现了。有一个片刻蔚蓝的天空里出现了一朵云，神们可以看到他，登山。然后云消失了，因为那个念头消失了。我非常喜欢这个故事。
This idea arose in him, and suddenly a self was there and the gods could see him. The emptiness was no more empty. Suddenly an idea had crystallised; an attitude, a mind had come. For a moment a cloud appeared in the blue sky and the gods could see this man, Tozan. Then the cloud disappeared because the idea disappeared. I like the story very much.
无论何时，只要有念头，你是，然后就会有云出现。不会只有一片云。在你内在有非常多的念头，数百万计的云持续的漂浮着，一层又一层的把你遮盖住。你内在的天空完全被遮住了，遮的严严实实。你甚至瞥都瞥不见它。
Whenever there is an idea, you are, and then a cloud arises. And there is not only one cloud. There are so many ideas in you, millions of clouds which continuously haunt you, covering you in layers and layers of cloud. Your inner sky is completely hidden. You can’t even have a glimpse of it.
甚至一个小小的念头“是谁这么粗心大意？”——这没什么特别，没什么值得担心的。它只是一个好奇“是谁这么粗心大意？”但这也足够了！如果你看到早上的太阳，你说“好美啊”——足够了！它只是一个小小的碎片，但是它会在你内在制造压力，这就是为何你立刻就想对别人说“瞧，清晨真的好美啊！”
Even a small idea like ’Who has been so careless?’ – it was nothing special, nothing much to worry about. It was just a curious ’Who has been so careless?’ but it was enough! If you see the morning sun and you say ’How beautiful’ – enough! It is just a small fragment but it creates an inner pressure in you, and that’s why you immediately want to say to somebody ’Look, how beautiful the morning is!
这是一种释放。那份压力在你内在，当你讲话它就被排掉了；你把它释放掉了。你感觉良好，你已经说出了它。如果你找不到任何人，它就越加的萦绕在你脑海里。如果你可以写一封信，那么你就把它结束了。我们的头脑总是被各种的念头、情绪和心绪所淹没。
That is a release. The pressure has been inside and when you talk it is catharted; you release it. You feel good, you have said it. If you cannot find anybody, it will haunt you more. If you can write a letter, then you are finished with it. Our mind is continuously overflooded with ideas, emotions, sentiments.
渐渐地放松下来，放空。作为一个空无来生活、前行。不要用任何方式来保护你自己，因为这会让你封闭起来。恐惧在那里——接纳它。放松，让它在那里。跟它在一起。不要试着做任何事情来跟它抗衡，因为出于恐惧，不管你做什么，都会制造出更多的恐惧。就只是接纳它。你能做什么呢？
By and by relax, be empty. Just go as an emptiness. Don’t try to protect yourself in any way because that will make you closed. Fear is there – accept it. Relax and let it be there. Remain with it. Don’t try to do anything against it because whatsoever you do out of fear will create more fear. Just accept it. What can you do?
【就在O老头快要讲完之前，一只正在低鸣的布谷鸟突然大叫起来，打破了傍晚的宁静。】
[Just as Osho uttered the last words, a cuckoo, quietly calling out to a friend, suddenly broke into loud song, filling the stillness of the evening.]
那只布谷鸟疯了——你能做什么？就像那样子！
The cuckoo is going crazy – what can you do? Just like that!
如果你的喉咙感觉到恐惧，好；接纳它，放松。我会跟你在一起。
If the throat is feeling fear, okay; accept and relax. And I am coming with you.
译自Beloved of My Heart